A Masterpiece Of Indecision

by The Black Elephant Band

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1.
LYRICS this broken harp sounds just like a broken heart and i try superhard to make you notice cause if you detect my defects goes to show we're all just human souls trying superhard this asthmatic breath sounds just like approaching death and i try superhard to cherish breathing far as i comprehend it will end but before we are all just human souls trying superhard
2.
LYRICS he wore a track suit right from the 70s and chugged those beers down with mesmerizing speed some say it was concentration right there in his eyes that were wandering hazily both left and right the bruno sammartino of drinking in his celebration we did indulge the bruno sammartino of drinking dove headfirst into the bark mulch the bruno sammartino of drinking oh i think he needed stitches the bruno sammartino of drinking because karma is a bitch yes his chunky build his manly chin he couldn't even help it it was clear he'd win and the somersaults he did to celebrate his victory were the most lovely witlessness that i have ever seen the bruno sammartino of drinking in his celebration we did indulge the bruno sammartino of drinking dove headfirst into the bark mulch the bruno sammartino of drinking oh i think he needed stitches the bruno sammartino of drinking because karma is a bitch yes you gotta lie down, little bruno but not like that but it's okay, you're still a hero with that bandage round your head
3.
02:22
LYRICS there's an island in the kennedy channel next to greenland way up north and far out denmark and canada are waging a war there that few have even heard about but it's not all that severe, not many casualties here soldiers throwing up, that's about it not much fighting going on and a zero death toll they use a neurotoxin, it's called alcohol on hans island and they say just share a beer, don't spread the fear but the comradery, borderless empathy compassion and booze - and no one will lose and at some point no one will even remember what other wars are like hi my name is lars, hi my name is mike rather hungover than dead, a headache is better than being stabbed in the head - we can agree on that, so let's fight like they do on hans island let's fight like they do in hans island on hans island
4.
LYRICS i died in freddy's sports goods store, the owner stabbed me in cold blood my life's end and a ball pump is everything i got heyhey i died in freddy's sports goods store tonight i digitally transferred him my soul and that was that i'll never do no sports no more and the football remains flat heyhey i died in freddy's sports goods store tonight
5.
LYRICS and i wore these shoes in all kinds of weather playin these blues on the road doesn't make them look better but with all of the ache in my heart and the world i'll never learn to fly like a bird so i'll never give these shoes a break and i wore these shoes in all kinds of weather playin these blues on the road doesn't make them look better but with all of the ache in my heart and the world i'll never learn to fly like a bird so i'll never give these shoes a break never give these shoes a break never give these shoes a break
6.
02:45
LYRICS at least i'm sober, at least i can think i choose to think about how much i will drink and i guess that i'll drink every beer i can find it's okay to do that with a sober mind and yes i only hang around at the bar far from commanding a starship still i'd like to be just like picard in the best TNG scripts the captain always had a solution for injustice and corruption, aggression and pollution the captain always got out of impossible situations and led his crew into the next generation the captain was always calm and confident, was always strong and he did fuckin admit whenever he was fuckin wrong and it didn't do him any harm and yes i only hang around at the bar far from commanding a starship still i'd like to be just like picard in the best TNG scripts but i'm not like the captain, mostly i'm just a bum but oh yes the captain inspires me to become the best bum i can become
7.
LYRICS i was standing in the shower filled with maddening frustration because for about half an hour i was busy with operation 'squeezing the bottle of shampoo' shakin it and all the things you do when it's reluctant to leave its home and turn into a cleansing foam that morning gravity was my enemy i couldn't understand until the shampoo missed my hand for the first time i whispered 'fuck!' but thought 'alright, fine just try again' i was standing in the shower filled with maddening frustration because for about half an hour i was busy with operation 'squeezing the bottle of shampoo' shakin it and all the things you do when it's reluctant to leave its home and turn into a cleansing foam that morning gravity was my enemy started to understand when the shampoo missed my hand for the second time i muttered 'fuck!' started to moan and whine just try again' i was standing in the shower filled with maddening frustration because for about half an hour i was busy with operation 'squeezing the bottle of shampoo' shakin it and all the things you do when it's reluctant to leave its home and turn into a cleansing foam that morning gravity was my enemy finally could understand when the shampoo missed my hand for the third time i cried out 'fuck!' started to lose my mind just try again' that morning gravity was my friend when the shampoo found my hand that morning gravity was my friend when the shampoo found my hand that morning gravity was my friend when the shampoo found my hand that morning gravity was my friend when the shampoo found my hand
8.
LYRICS i bought no ink all summer i bought no ink all winter it's not even the money i'd spend it's more of a social experiment do i need to buy ink this summer? do i need to buy ink this winter? for quite a long time now i've been studying the question how long can i possibly go without a printer? the ink has run dry it's all dead inside but it has a passive kind of beauty the way it sits there next to my desk so it's probably best not to tinker with my dusty, old, comatose printer you might say it is lazy you might say it's naive but i got friendly neighbors and an office job does that make me a leech? does that make me a thief? sometimes i do ride my bike to the printing shop but how long can i possibly go without a printer? the ink has run dry, it's all dead inside but it reminds me that there are so many things that we don't really need and most things you can get used, second hand, recycled and really cheap and that is very much good enough for little old me
9.
still had my hands on my cock when i saw the hands of the clock moving too quickly, hm, this day will be tricky i'm already too late, it's not like i already ate but i need to get paid, so i'll be there, i'll be there, don't worry now during my working hours sometimes i feel the power of the capitalism machine crushing my spirit, my dreams and all the time that i spend at a job that i resent just to pay the rent, yeah i'll be there, i'll be there, don't worry it's not all bad this job, but if the clocks would all stop during my shift today, well that would not be okay in fact it would be quite bad, i guess i'd kill myself dead but i need to get paid, so i'll live through it, don't worry there's a lot of shitty ways to die but the worst one is to get fired from a life you never wanted
10.
LYRICS and by now that is more or less only crystal meth underneath her dress her presence still makes me beautifully nervous when she sings it all wrong for the punk rock virgins this year she only wrote half a song she felt the words came out all wrong she sang 'i'm a matchstick beauty i'm easily flammable but i wont burn for long' and then there was only this one festival that took her and when i'm honest, i think they had a deaf booker, i think she was born with demons of all sorts and ended up strangled by these umbilical chords this year she only wrote half a song she felt the words came out all wrong she sang 'i'm a matchstick beauty i'm easily flammable but i wont burn for long'
11.
LYRICS what makes us human beings is supposed to be compassion but when i look at politics compassion's in regression it seems to run out of style but when i look at art everything that runs out of style seems to return after a little while sometimes your heart is bleeding when times get super tough and everyday a new problem emerges to think your heart is strong and fierce might just not be enough so how bout this: your heart is where your cardiovascular system converges now this is quite a medical thought and not all that romantic and all in all it seems a little distant but let's keep looking for that wisdom that floats around within our urges and our childish antics your heart is where your cardiovascular system converges
12.
LYRICS i told you i love you and kept hanging on, pretty pointless i applied for a job soon as i was born, pretty pointless i tried to debate with the far far right, pretty pointless now i'm waiting at this traffic light, the streets are empty late at night but i try to avoid stress, don't get my hopes up anymore cause it's all pretty pointless, don't really know what hope is for i tried to write a pop song with lyrics so cheesy and pointless it went down really really ever so easy, but pointless it seems like some lyrics are just out to please me but pointless i want to be irritated, surprised and overwhelmed but when the lyrics are challenging no one will listen to the thing on the radio, so i don't really get my hopes up anymore and if there's no point at all, that is totally fine, seems to reduce stress quite relaxing really, thinking that arguing and fighting is pointless it may sound a bit sad at first, but i'm not talking about an emptiness more like an invulnerable grin glued into your face and maybe i'm just fucking wrong and there is a point to all this shit and we can guess what it is when the conservatives don't approve of it
13.
LYRICS caveman, caveman, oh how i wish i was you with that small a brain i wouldn't even try to construe how my shopping's related to poverty and world hunger the only thing i'd do all day long would be yelling unga bunga plus i've got some mad respect for anyone who can kill a t-rex caveman, caveman, oh how i wish i was you with that small a brain i wouldn't grasp the concept of truth or the complicated stuff in the news - right there in the telly (i wouldn't have one) the only thing i'd focus on would be the unga bunga yelling plus i've got some mad respect for anyone who can kill a t-rex and hey you survived the dinosaurs now isn't that a happy second chorus
14.
LYRICS chapter one: i was pretty much done with the night had kissed a pretty girl, went home alone, but felt alright about it then in front of the grand hotel i encountered a whole bunch of yelling people in suits all in a bad mood and shouting at one another like rabid dogs i decided to investigate those guys had sparked my interest although it was rather cold and late but it was the most enraged drunkard bunch of well dressed businessmen probably just coming from an office christmas party that i had ever seen and so in front of the grand hotel i encountered one of them who joined me in quietly enjoying the spectacle we were both quite amused by his colleagues chapter two: one of them was shunned by others and walked away from the group but only for 10 meters, where he found a new brother just lying there on the street, in the cold and his own vomit i hadn't noticed the teenaged boy before and now it really stopped being funny and so in front of the grand hotel that drunk businessman got sort of touchy with the young boy pulling him up, dragging him in through the front door but they were kicked right out again the teen had tried it before chapter three: now it seemed up to me to help those two fuck ups, dead drunk and without destination now make no mistake, i was dead drunk too and quite overwhelmed with the situation the businessman was a wildcard, from the start i knew i had to keep those two apart and so in front of the grand hotel the three of us spent very uncomfortable minutes until finally a fucking cab arrived that brought upon the end of that superweird night and so in front of the grand hotel the three of us spent very uncomfortable minutes until finally a fucking cab arrived that brought upon the end of that superweird night
15.
01:55
LYRICS and i'm flyin in my lederhosen to the moon back on earth they're askin where has all our money gone what have we done - bavaria one there's a satellite shaped like a weißwurst the engines are runnin' on bierdurst hurray for the bavarian race and the wies'n up in space what have we done - bavaria one but there's a pretzel in the cables and the captain spilled his beer and so finally this entire 'mia san mia' ideology is burnin' up in the atmosphere what have we done - bavaria one
16.
LYRICS suicidal animals - are they not well? suicidal animals - are they mental? once there was this bird that flew into my driving car pretty crazy was it a kamikaze thing to do or was it just tired and lazy always lookin where to fly keepin its eyes open all the time suicidal animals - are they not well? suicidal animals - are they mental? then there was this deer in the forest of my grandma jumpin at the fences like a maniac it had a broken neck already from jumpin at the fences but it kept manically jumpin at the fences why did it do it was it so depressed? suicidal animals - are they not well? suicidal animals - are they mental? they probably are then there was this kamikaze rabbit that jumped into my tire it was dark and pretty late i tried to scratch its corpse of the road but to no avail the thing was so heavy and sort of glued to the floor by its own blood and gore suicidal animals - are they not well? suicidal animals - are they mental? society probably made them this way have you seen this documentary with the russian walrusses commiting mass suicide wanted to see what happens if they all jump off that cliff its by far one of the most terrifying things i've ever seen in any documentary if you are an animal and life is treating you like shit you're done and tired of your existence it's okay to quit it's okay to quit it's okay to quit humans wont mind a bit
17.
LYRICS three couples and a guy with a guitar
18.
03:36
LYRICS climate change is coming to town and there's gonna be hell toupet now that is the thing that trump wears above his face get it? a hell toupet and every morning i gotta benchpress one entire frenchpress just to be fit for the day and all the news of decay - i'd like to become a fucked up old man so please greta and all the other smart kids out there please make sure that i can ELBOW ME! the most random thing on this planet is a border still we pretend that it's the natural order i think it's a farce, people settling on mars, the only thing stupider'd be settling on jupiter ELBOW ME! whenever i buy plastic and throw it away whenever i drown the bad news in my drink and start thinking that it is way too late and all the worst thoughts i can think ELBOW ME! whenever i forget that i'm not alone on this dripping ice cream cone whenever i think one elbow's not enough come by my house to push and shove with a million elbow's tough love shove ELBOW ME!
19.
LYRICS now i was born with non-toxic blood a fairly reasonable amount i'm told this could help alleviate the populations body count and after all it is self-regenerating what am i gonna do with it except give it away to the one's who really need it donate that shit so i walked in to the red cross station, where they would take my body fluid i'm told its a questionable organisation but i was there and i thought, what the hell, just do it when in walked a nazi i could see it on his shirt he wore the logo of a right-wing brand, a bald head and a tattoo of an unmistakable bird now the thought alone of having that brown soup flowing through my veins made my inerts slowly rot we quickly organized a choir to tell that guy right there and then we don't want your nazi blood! but i suppose it's his good right to do good deeds and to donate his brown soup to those in need i just hope his cruel ignorance of history's pages is not biologically contagious we don't want your nazi blood! now who's the villain of the story? there probably are two i caught myself full of prejudice and fear that's what youd expect from the nazi, and i guess he wanted to help, too scary that we had the same idea but the thought alone of having that brown soup flowing through my veins made my inerts slowly rot we quickly organized a choir to tell that guy right there and then we don't want your nazi blood!
20.
LYRICS down, down the throat it goes what exactly it does to your brain, no one knows cause you were quite crazy - already - when you were sober i thought you know what you're doing, after all you're a bit older and i thought it might be nice, i thought i'd like to be your lover but the empty bottles in your room make it hard to climb into your bed for cover wouldn't wanna be your liver wouldn't wanna be your liver i'd like to be your lover but i wouldn't wanna be your liver i'd like to be your lover but i wouldn't wanna be your liver down, down the throat you chug it and then you run to find your bucket you have that sexy crosseyed look in our face when you want to take me back to your place and i think it might be nice, yes i'd like to be your lover but the empty bottles in your room make it hard to climb into your bed for cover wouldn't wanna be your liver wouldn't wanna be your liver i'd like to be your lover but i wouldn't wanna be your liver i'd like to be your lover but i wouldn't wanna be your liver down, down the throat it goes

about

recorded and mixed by DOMI BACK in november 2019
produced by DOMI BACK + the black elephant band
mastered by MICHI WINKLER / bekassine records
special thx to WINSTON MCCLOUD
cover artwork by WOLFGANG SPEER

credits

released April 12, 2020

all songs written and performed by the black elephant band
with

JOHNNY SALAMI on drums and percussion (2,4,12,16,18)

JOHN STEAM JR on acoustic guitar, mandolin (11),
eletric guitar (6,18,20), lapsteel (5), bass (4,11,18)

GOLD RUSHIAN on electric guitar (1,4,9,12)
and tiny little spacemachine (1,9,13,15)

FABI QUATTRO FORMAGGI on bass (16)

DOMI BACK on drums (10), bass (13), piano (14), cowbell (18)

KARIN RABHANSL, JOHNNY SALAMI, ROMEO SCALES, LUNA BURKERT on backing vocals and shouts

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The Black Elephant Band Nuremberg, Germany

„[...] ungeschliffene, gestochen scharf auf den Punkt kommende, englischsprachige
Songminitaturen voll von schrägem Humor und bitterbösen Weltbetrachtungen, die schlecht
gestimmte Gitarre schnörkellos rudimentär, die Stimme ein wütendes Knurren, kaum ein Lied
länger als zweieinhalb Minuten. Wunderbar!“ (NN)

"Schräger Antifolk mit Bart, Klampfe und Mundharmonika. Zum Verlieben!" (A&F)
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